Folks, I’m tired. TIRED. So tired, I think I could sleep for a month, and I’d still be exhausted. It’s a combination of stress (work), kids (waking up every few hours during the night), and…I don’t know what else.
I started off well this week, and have since devolved into eating chocolate, sweets, and any other bit of crap I can think of. Not good.
I’m going through one of those periods when I feel pressure to FIGURE SHIT OUT, but I’m not quite sure what I need to figure out. I think I’m experiencing a burn-out of sorts with teaching, for sure. I haven’t had a semester off since…2007? I didn’t take any time off when I had the boys, and I haven’t taken any summers off. I wish I could afford to.
I need a break. Seriously.
I also feel this pressure (from myself) to start focusing on my writing again. I want to apply to MFA programs in the next year, and start submitting pieces for publication again. Along with that, I want/need a website devoted to writing, which has led to the debate about social media, and what I want public or private. I don’t know that I want my students finding this blog, or my Twitter account. But do I need to hide everything? Do I want to?
All I know right now is that I need a break. No grading, no diapers to change, or mouths to feed. I need a date with my husband. A real date, not a trip to Target or the grocery store. We haven’t had a real date in…I can’t even remember.
I just want to catch my breath before I move on. Is that too much to ask?
A Last Confession 